Ahh How true lol.
NICKNAMES
• If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.
• If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Dickhead and Shit for Brains.
EATING OUT
• When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.
• When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.
MONEY
• A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
• A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.
BATHROOMS
• A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel.
• The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.
ARGUMENTS
• A woman has the last word in any argument.
• Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
FUTURE
• A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
• A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
SUCCESS
• A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
• A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
MARRIAGE
• A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
• A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.
DRESSING UP
• A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.
• A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.
NATURAL
• Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
• Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
OFFSPRING
• Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.
• A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
A married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing!
Finally to wrap todays post up the diffrence between a woman's diary and a mans.
Her Diary:
Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at
a nice restaurant for dinner. I was shopping with my friends all day long,
so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no
comment on it. Conversation wasn't flowing, so I suggested that we go
somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed, but he didn't say much. I asked
him what was wrong; He said, 'Nothing.' I asked him if it was my fault that
he was upset. He said he wasn't upset, that it had nothing to do with me,
and not to worry about it. On the way home, I told him that I loved him. He
smiled slightly, and kept driving. I can't explain his behavior I don't know
why he didn't say, 'I love you, too.' When we got home, I felt as if I had
lost him completely, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore.He just
sat there quietly, and watched TV. He continued to seem distant and absent.
Finally, with silence all around us, I decided to go to bed. About 15
minutes later, he came to bed. To my surprise, he responded to my caress,
and we made love. But I still felt that he was distracted, and his thoughts
were somewhere else. He fell asleep - I cried. I don't know what to do. I'm
almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else. My life is a disaster.
His Diary:
Bike wouldn't start today. Can't figure it out, but at least I got laid.
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Monday, August 9, 2010
Man freed after fatal Toyota crash 'tried everything' to stop car
Its about time Toyota has started taking responsibility for this. Read this article and they need to pay restitution for to this man.
(CNN) -- A Minnesota man is grateful for his newfound freedom after three years in prison for a fatal car crash he says wasn't his fault. But Koua Fong Lee said on CNN's "American Morning" on Monday that he can't forget the tragic repercussions of the 2006 incident, which he says was caused by faulty Toyota brakes.
"Today, I'm free now. So, I feel really good to reunion with my family and to be with my family, but it's still in my mind this accident's cost to life. And even through I'm returned to my family, I'm free, but three people that died on that day cannot return to their families," Lee said.
On Thursday, Ramsey County, Minnesota, District Judge Joanne Smith ordered Lee's release from prison, pending a new trial related to the sudden-acceleration crash of his Toyota Camry that killed three people.
Judge frees man convicted in fatal Toyota crash
Ramsey County Prosecutor Susan Gaertner immediately said she would drop the charges and wouldn't retry Lee.
"Mr. Lee will be a free man," Gaertner said in a written statement.
A jury convicted Lee of criminal vehicular homicide in 2007, and he was sentenced to eight years in prison
Lee had always maintained his innocence, saying the 1996 Camry accelerated uncontrollably before it crashed into two vehicles, killing a man, his 10-year-old son and a 6-year-old girl.
"I also want people to know that I'm not the one who caused the accident and I try everything I could to stop my car," Lee said on "American Morning" on Monday.
On Thursday, Lee asked the victims' family to forgive him and believe his story. In fact, the family of the victims had long ago become convinced of Lee's innocence and joined the effort to free him. They are suing Toyota.
"It's a bittersweet victory," Bridgette Trice, whose daughter died of injuries suffered in the crash, told CNN affiliate KARE-TV on Thursday. "I'm happy for the Lee family, that they're getting their justice. We want answers, and they're coming slowly but they're coming surely."
Mae Adams, whose nephews died in the accident, told KARE, "Our day is yet to come. ... We couldn't let this man sit in jail, no matter how much we wanted to know what happened."
Lee was driving home from Sunday services with his pregnant wife, father, daughter, brother and niece. He told investigators that he pumped the brakes as he exited Interstate 94 in St. Paul, Minnesota, and approached an intersection, said his new lawyer, Brent Schafer.
But Ramsey County prosecutors said at trial that Lee had his foot on the gas as he approached cars waiting at a red light. The car was moving at 70 to 90 mph when it struck the other vehicles.
Two mechanical engineers examined the car before trial on behalf of the state and the defense, Gaertner said earlier this year. Both concluded the brakes were operating and there were no problems with the acceleration, she said.
"Bottom line, two experts -- one for each side -- said there was nothing wrong with the car," she said.
But Schafer said on "American Morning" on Monday that other evidence was ignored or misstated during the 2007 trial, leading to Lee's conviction.
"We found out, actually, it was known back in 2006, not long after this accident occurred, that if you were to look at the brake filament, you would have been able to tell that the brake lamp was illuminated at the time of the impact, which basically was evidence in support of Koua's story that the car was out of control and that he did everything to stop it. So, in fact, his foot was on the brake. That evidence was known prior to the trial." Schafer added, "By looking at the filament, it was clear -- and I don't think any experts disagree with this -- that the brakes were on at the point of impact."
Schafer also said the prosecution had false information about the type of brakes in the Camry.
"In addition, there was evidence at trial that this car did not have ABS brakes, which was a big part of the state's case. Because there were no skid marks, they concluded Koua was not on the brakes, and that was simply false testimony and I think that was also a key issue that led to his conviction," he said.
The 1996 Camry is not a part of Toyota's recall. Lee's accident is among the first of a growing number of cases getting a second look since Toyota announced the recall, acknowledging that problems with sudden acceleration are more extensive than originally thought.
In testimony before Congress, company executives apologized for underestimating the problem. Toyota recalled more than 8 million vehicles, prompting Schafer to seek a re-examination of the vehicle in the 2006 accident.
"This never seemed right. A man with his family in the car -- his pregnant wife -- goes on a suicide mission? Then, the recalls started, and the complaints sounded just like what happened to Mr. Lee," Schafer said in March. "It sounds just like a case of unintended acceleration."
In the end, though, the conviction was vacated not only because of evidence of mechanical failure, but also because Judge Smith determined Lee's original attorney, Tracy Eichhorn-Hicks, had failed to defend him adequately at trial.
Eichhorn-Hicks had stated in court that Lee must have had his foot on the accelerator, even though Lee himself always maintained that he had pumped the brake to no avail.
"Compelling evidence was produced at Mr. Lee's evidentiary hearing on the issue of ineffective assistance of counsel," prosecutor Gaertner's statement said. "I wish Mr. Lee and his family the very best."
(CNN) -- A Minnesota man is grateful for his newfound freedom after three years in prison for a fatal car crash he says wasn't his fault. But Koua Fong Lee said on CNN's "American Morning" on Monday that he can't forget the tragic repercussions of the 2006 incident, which he says was caused by faulty Toyota brakes.
"Today, I'm free now. So, I feel really good to reunion with my family and to be with my family, but it's still in my mind this accident's cost to life. And even through I'm returned to my family, I'm free, but three people that died on that day cannot return to their families," Lee said.
On Thursday, Ramsey County, Minnesota, District Judge Joanne Smith ordered Lee's release from prison, pending a new trial related to the sudden-acceleration crash of his Toyota Camry that killed three people.
Judge frees man convicted in fatal Toyota crash
Ramsey County Prosecutor Susan Gaertner immediately said she would drop the charges and wouldn't retry Lee.
"Mr. Lee will be a free man," Gaertner said in a written statement.
A jury convicted Lee of criminal vehicular homicide in 2007, and he was sentenced to eight years in prison
Lee had always maintained his innocence, saying the 1996 Camry accelerated uncontrollably before it crashed into two vehicles, killing a man, his 10-year-old son and a 6-year-old girl.
"I also want people to know that I'm not the one who caused the accident and I try everything I could to stop my car," Lee said on "American Morning" on Monday.
On Thursday, Lee asked the victims' family to forgive him and believe his story. In fact, the family of the victims had long ago become convinced of Lee's innocence and joined the effort to free him. They are suing Toyota.
"It's a bittersweet victory," Bridgette Trice, whose daughter died of injuries suffered in the crash, told CNN affiliate KARE-TV on Thursday. "I'm happy for the Lee family, that they're getting their justice. We want answers, and they're coming slowly but they're coming surely."
Mae Adams, whose nephews died in the accident, told KARE, "Our day is yet to come. ... We couldn't let this man sit in jail, no matter how much we wanted to know what happened."
Lee was driving home from Sunday services with his pregnant wife, father, daughter, brother and niece. He told investigators that he pumped the brakes as he exited Interstate 94 in St. Paul, Minnesota, and approached an intersection, said his new lawyer, Brent Schafer.
But Ramsey County prosecutors said at trial that Lee had his foot on the gas as he approached cars waiting at a red light. The car was moving at 70 to 90 mph when it struck the other vehicles.
Two mechanical engineers examined the car before trial on behalf of the state and the defense, Gaertner said earlier this year. Both concluded the brakes were operating and there were no problems with the acceleration, she said.
"Bottom line, two experts -- one for each side -- said there was nothing wrong with the car," she said.
But Schafer said on "American Morning" on Monday that other evidence was ignored or misstated during the 2007 trial, leading to Lee's conviction.
"We found out, actually, it was known back in 2006, not long after this accident occurred, that if you were to look at the brake filament, you would have been able to tell that the brake lamp was illuminated at the time of the impact, which basically was evidence in support of Koua's story that the car was out of control and that he did everything to stop it. So, in fact, his foot was on the brake. That evidence was known prior to the trial." Schafer added, "By looking at the filament, it was clear -- and I don't think any experts disagree with this -- that the brakes were on at the point of impact."
Schafer also said the prosecution had false information about the type of brakes in the Camry.
"In addition, there was evidence at trial that this car did not have ABS brakes, which was a big part of the state's case. Because there were no skid marks, they concluded Koua was not on the brakes, and that was simply false testimony and I think that was also a key issue that led to his conviction," he said.
The 1996 Camry is not a part of Toyota's recall. Lee's accident is among the first of a growing number of cases getting a second look since Toyota announced the recall, acknowledging that problems with sudden acceleration are more extensive than originally thought.
In testimony before Congress, company executives apologized for underestimating the problem. Toyota recalled more than 8 million vehicles, prompting Schafer to seek a re-examination of the vehicle in the 2006 accident.
"This never seemed right. A man with his family in the car -- his pregnant wife -- goes on a suicide mission? Then, the recalls started, and the complaints sounded just like what happened to Mr. Lee," Schafer said in March. "It sounds just like a case of unintended acceleration."
In the end, though, the conviction was vacated not only because of evidence of mechanical failure, but also because Judge Smith determined Lee's original attorney, Tracy Eichhorn-Hicks, had failed to defend him adequately at trial.
Eichhorn-Hicks had stated in court that Lee must have had his foot on the accelerator, even though Lee himself always maintained that he had pumped the brake to no avail.
"Compelling evidence was produced at Mr. Lee's evidentiary hearing on the issue of ineffective assistance of counsel," prosecutor Gaertner's statement said. "I wish Mr. Lee and his family the very best."
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
NEWS FLASH!
Scientists at MIT (Mammary Institute of Technology) have discovered a new force, quite possibly the most powerful yet. Researchers have dubbed this new force "breast gravity." It is the nearly irresistible force that draws men’s eyes down to women’s breasts.
"The idea came to me out of the blue," says team leader Frank Leerer. "I was walking along the beach with a colleague of mine, and we saw a woman in a string bikini. ‘Check out the globes on her!’ he said. That’s when the idea hit me like a brick house."
Theorists have been working around the clock to explain the biophysical mechanism behind the phenomenon. It is believed that like the other fundamental forces of the universe, breast gravity is mediated by an elementary particle. MIT scientists have named this theoretical particle the "boobon."
Many aspects of the new force have now been determined empirically. It is known that breast gravity grows exponentially with breast size. Also, experimentalists think that many materials must absorb boobons, because layers of clothing can significantly decrease the force. (A large parka can sometimes nullify the effect completely.)
Still, there are mysteries yet to be solved. For example, why are almost all men’s eyes affected, but only a small fraction of women’s? How can it be that the force is transmitted even through televised and printed images of breasts?
Scientists everywhere are looking into it.
Scientists at MIT (Mammary Institute of Technology) have discovered a new force, quite possibly the most powerful yet. Researchers have dubbed this new force "breast gravity." It is the nearly irresistible force that draws men’s eyes down to women’s breasts.
"The idea came to me out of the blue," says team leader Frank Leerer. "I was walking along the beach with a colleague of mine, and we saw a woman in a string bikini. ‘Check out the globes on her!’ he said. That’s when the idea hit me like a brick house."
Theorists have been working around the clock to explain the biophysical mechanism behind the phenomenon. It is believed that like the other fundamental forces of the universe, breast gravity is mediated by an elementary particle. MIT scientists have named this theoretical particle the "boobon."
Many aspects of the new force have now been determined empirically. It is known that breast gravity grows exponentially with breast size. Also, experimentalists think that many materials must absorb boobons, because layers of clothing can significantly decrease the force. (A large parka can sometimes nullify the effect completely.)
Still, there are mysteries yet to be solved. For example, why are almost all men’s eyes affected, but only a small fraction of women’s? How can it be that the force is transmitted even through televised and printed images of breasts?
Scientists everywhere are looking into it.
Monday, July 26, 2010
Why Can't I Own a Canadian?
Why Can't I Own a Canadian?
October 2002
Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a radio personality who dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio show. Recently, she said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22 and cannot be condoned under any circumstance. The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a east coast resident, which was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative:
Dear Dr. Laura:
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them:
When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?
I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15:19- 24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.
Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?
A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?
Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?
Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?
I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?
My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? - Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)
I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.
Your devoted fan,
Jim
October 2002
Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a radio personality who dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio show. Recently, she said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22 and cannot be condoned under any circumstance. The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a east coast resident, which was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative:
Dear Dr. Laura:
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them:
When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?
I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15:19- 24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.
Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?
A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?
Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?
Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?
I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?
My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? - Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)
I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.
Your devoted fan,
Jim
Friday, May 14, 2010
Fun things to do
Fun things to do
Whenever you are next bored, or feel like being annoying, here are some cool things to do.
At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
Insist that your email address begins with 'xena-warrior-princess' or 'elvis-the-king'.
Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN."
Develop an unnatural fear of staplers.
Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
In the memo field of all your checks, write "FOR SEXUAL FAVORS".
Finish all your sentences with, "In accordance with the prophecy."
dont use any punctuation
As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.
Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".
Sing along at the opera.
Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
Put mosquito netting around your cubicle at work. Play a tape of jungle sounds all day.
Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.
Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Hard.
When the money comes out of the cash machine, scream "I Won! I Won! Third time this week!"
When leaving the zoo, run towards the parking lot, yelling "Run for your lives, they're loose!"
Pay off your MasterCard with your Visa.
Pop some popcorn without putting on the lid.
When someone says, "Have a nice day," tell them you have other plans.
Send yourself a CandyGram.
Have a tea party with your pets.
Make a list of things to do that you have already done.
Put your toddler's clothes on backwards and send him to school as if nothing was wrong.
Write checks with Roman numerals.
Write "Out to lunch" on your forehead.
Leaf through a National Geographic and draw clothes on everybody.
Drive to the store in reverse.
Start a nasty rumor and see if you recognize it when it comes back to you.
Read the dictionary backwards and look for hidden messages.
Bill your doctor for time spent in the waiting room.
Stare at people through the points of a fork and pretend they're in jail.
Make up a language and stop someone to ask for directions.
Write a short story using alphabet soup.
Talk to your fish.
Kill roaches with a monkey wrench while playing Wagnerian arias.
Start conversations with the words, "Did you ever wonder why..."
Burn all your waste paper while eyeing your roommate suspiciously.
Buy a complete set of Transformers. Play with them loudly. If people comment, tell them with a straight face, "There's more to them than meets the eye."
Whenever you are next bored, or feel like being annoying, here are some cool things to do.
At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
Insist that your email address begins with 'xena-warrior-princess' or 'elvis-the-king'.
Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN."
Develop an unnatural fear of staplers.
Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
In the memo field of all your checks, write "FOR SEXUAL FAVORS".
Finish all your sentences with, "In accordance with the prophecy."
dont use any punctuation
As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.
Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".
Sing along at the opera.
Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
Put mosquito netting around your cubicle at work. Play a tape of jungle sounds all day.
Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.
Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Hard.
When the money comes out of the cash machine, scream "I Won! I Won! Third time this week!"
When leaving the zoo, run towards the parking lot, yelling "Run for your lives, they're loose!"
Pay off your MasterCard with your Visa.
Pop some popcorn without putting on the lid.
When someone says, "Have a nice day," tell them you have other plans.
Send yourself a CandyGram.
Have a tea party with your pets.
Make a list of things to do that you have already done.
Put your toddler's clothes on backwards and send him to school as if nothing was wrong.
Write checks with Roman numerals.
Write "Out to lunch" on your forehead.
Leaf through a National Geographic and draw clothes on everybody.
Drive to the store in reverse.
Start a nasty rumor and see if you recognize it when it comes back to you.
Read the dictionary backwards and look for hidden messages.
Bill your doctor for time spent in the waiting room.
Stare at people through the points of a fork and pretend they're in jail.
Make up a language and stop someone to ask for directions.
Write a short story using alphabet soup.
Talk to your fish.
Kill roaches with a monkey wrench while playing Wagnerian arias.
Start conversations with the words, "Did you ever wonder why..."
Burn all your waste paper while eyeing your roommate suspiciously.
Buy a complete set of Transformers. Play with them loudly. If people comment, tell them with a straight face, "There's more to them than meets the eye."
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Old School Baseball
I'm a little upset with the athletes today. People holding out, baseball players using steroids -- what the hell is that? Using steroids, man, that ain't nothing like the old school. Remember the old school guys? These guys were men. Babe Ruth hit over 700 home runs after, like, banging hookers all night.... Bret Ernst
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Welcome to the wonderful world of humankind.
Welcome to the wonderful world of humankind.
What a crazy world! We've got crazy fundamentalist Muslims who want to die for Allah, crazy fundamentalist Christians who want to tell everyone how to behave, crazy anti-abortion clinic bombers who want to kill for life, crazy militia nuts crashing through the forest shooting cows, crazy employees who want to kill their bosses, crazy husbands who want to kill their wives and kids, crazy kids in street gangs who want to kill other crazy kids in other street gangs, and crazy professors who want to kill over tenure decisions, crazy wives who want to kill their husbands, crazy war on drugs that is a waste of taxpayer money, and a crazy government that won’t do anything about it in fear of offending some group along with the other crap the government is trying to do with our taxpayer money. WTF!!!!!!!!!
What a crazy world! We've got crazy fundamentalist Muslims who want to die for Allah, crazy fundamentalist Christians who want to tell everyone how to behave, crazy anti-abortion clinic bombers who want to kill for life, crazy militia nuts crashing through the forest shooting cows, crazy employees who want to kill their bosses, crazy husbands who want to kill their wives and kids, crazy kids in street gangs who want to kill other crazy kids in other street gangs, and crazy professors who want to kill over tenure decisions, crazy wives who want to kill their husbands, crazy war on drugs that is a waste of taxpayer money, and a crazy government that won’t do anything about it in fear of offending some group along with the other crap the government is trying to do with our taxpayer money. WTF!!!!!!!!!
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